Derby game alcohol theory????

If I start drinking now and build up to an alcoholic stupor to a point where I can dribble without control. Will that be enough to aid attendance at Goodison for the game????

Do i need to get my kids alcohol dependant or will they survive with just a 'chips and gravy' enhancement.

Season tickets are great but I am now dreading the turnstile!!!!!!

Please fellow depressed Evertonians give me your Derby game non drug induced coping strategies!!!

I never drink on derby day until after the game, mainly because I'm afraid I'll gob some spotty kopite and bring shame on my family. Theyre to be endured, not enjoyed as far as I'm concerned. Cant help you mate, sorry

I can deal with gobby kopites at the game -even if we lose (norwegian and cheshire select!)

the diificulty is the fucking shithouses that walk around all the north west and further afield that wear the Liverpool tops singing the 'filelds of analfield road' and ynwa (sorry cant't bear to type it properly!!) who have never been to merseyside never mind the shithouse ground that we left --to the festering maggot council funded scum.

There is a family round the corner to us that have the whole monty ---car stickers, matching his and hers LFC tea towels and everything else. The kids walk around in the tops and give my kids shite (my kids being season ticket holders at Everton) when we lose.

They have never even been to Anfield and should have been shot at birth- scum


That is the reason I am already feeling nervous

It was great when the 3-0 happened -they stayed in and watched Ian Rush milk adverts

We DID NOT walk around in tops -flying flags or anything else

WE came home with smiles and a tear in our eyes that WE are a proud non- egotistic, ground attending bunch that are chosen from birth to be EVERTONIAN

Ms_Moyesyside wrote:

I never drink on derby day until after the game, mainly because I'm afraid I'll gob some spotty kopite and bring shame on my family. Theyre to be endured, not enjoyed as far as I'm concerned. Cant help you mate, sorry

I dying to do that. I think they bring the worst out of me.

Haha Nonmank, great description of that family - I think there must be one in every street!

Like you say, we just rise above and one of these days when the whole club sinks into a cesspit of its own making, we'll have the last laugh - COYB

Open a tin of sweetcorn and empty the contents onto a small plate, leave the plate on the window ledge for a couple of days. After a couple of days you will see a 'film' has developed on top of the sweetcorn, breathe gently onto the tip of your index finger and gently roll it across the top of the 'film' so that the film sticks to your fingers.
Allow to dry with your body heat for a moment then ingest, suck your finger dry.
Within an hour or so you may vomit, do not worry, this is normal for food poisoning, and will pass once expunged, for the next 12 hours you will have mental hallucinations and won't have a scooby what is or has happened including wether or not you did or did not go to the game, allow your friends to reveal any favoured outcomes in a controlled environment.

Note this is only avalable for consenting adults and should not be confused with a half time treat ;)

Is nothing sacred without you having to turn it into something you can get high on. Sweetcorn!!!??

If you've watched the film the Doors, they go out into the desert and get high on a stuff called peyote,or divine cactus, it's a sort of funky plant, anyway it creates a trip similar to the way food poisoning does, and this way was taught to me by an old hippy I used to work with.He was seriously the most amazing talker I've ever met, could sit for hours listening tro his wild tales, he was a bit like Bill Bailey as well